I’ve been thinking on love lately, especially with
Valentine’s Day right around the corner.
Today, love is described in so many ways, and is mostly tied to feelings
and following your heart. This left me
wondering, “What is God’s definition of true love and can I even begin to gasp
it in my humanity?” Let me ask you this, “When you think of the words love and
the Bible, what is the first Scripture that comes to mind? Is it John 3:16 ‘God so loved the world…’? 1 John 4:19, ‘We love because He first loved us…’? Or
how about the famous 1 Corinthians 13 chapter about faith, hope, and love, but
the greatest of all is love?” While all
of these are beautiful pieces of Scripture, we often do two things when hearing/reading
them. You may be like me and not always
take the time to listen to what His Word is really saying - because you’ve
heard it quoted a thousand times. Or you
could be like the many, who when they read these chapters think love is a warm,
fuzzy feeling, giving emotion to someone who never makes them feel judged,
offended, or uncomfortable. The sad
truth is, not many of us really look at what biblical love is. I know I didn’t for a really long time. I do know this: From the small ways that God
has revealed His love through the Word, I think most of us need to have our
definitions collaborated to align with His definition of true love.
Let’s start with the basics. For those of us who are indwelt
believers, we’ve probably all heard this a time or two as well. God is Love.
Seems pretty simple, right? Let’s
take a closer look. If God is love, then
is it truly possible for an unbeliever to experience love without God? Many of us would probably say "Yes", because
the vast majority of the world does not believe that God is love. But that
doesn’t mean they don’t love their spouses, children, friends, etc. However, I think the more biblical answer is “no,
they do not.” Those who do not know God, can at best, only experience a cheap
imitation of the real thing…the worldly counterpart of God’s love. 1 John 4:8 tells us, “The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” A
wise man once told me, “Giving love is giving God. When you say ‘I love you,’
it is the same as saying ‘I God You.’ ” How can those who do not know God possibly
give Him away to another human soul?
Exactly, it’s not humanly
possible. This whole concept is what makes verse 19 in 1 John 4 actually make
sense, “We love, because He first loved
us.” In order to experience the true
definition of love, we first must be able to say that we know God’s love.
The best way for me to see this is to draw a comparison. If
we dig up Webster’s1 definition of love, the very first definition
we will find is this: “strong
affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties.” If we keep reading, we will
see that it continues into “attraction
based on sexual desire,” then “affection
based on admiration,” and so forth, until finally, after six (6)
definitions have been listed, we see God’s love make the list! Not exactly top of the list for the Author of
True Love is it? Now, let’s dig a little
deeper than our friend Webster and go see what the Hebrew tells us. The Hebrew is Ahavah, which “can describe
the love of husband toward his wife (Gen 29:20), God’s love for His people (Duet 7:8; 2 Chron. 2:11), and deep
abiding friendship (1 Sam. 18:3, 20:7).” 2 Scripture often refers to
it in the context of the “love of mercy” (ahavat
chesed), as in the following Scriptures: Jeremiah 31:3, “I have loved you with an everlasting love”-
Hosea 11:4, “I drew them…with bonds of
love” - Micah 6:8, “He has
told you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, And
to walk humbly with your God?” Then
traveling on, we of course have the definition of Agape or Agapao, which is
the definition used in context of some of the famous chapters in Scripture we
discussed earlier (John 3:16, 1 Corinthians 13, and 1 John 4:19). This is considered to be the highest form of
love, because the very definition incites an unselfish love and one full of
compassion. In reading through the
definition of Agape, the thing that strikes me the most is what has been
forgotten (or never told to us as believers) within its meaning. Here is what we will find if we keep reading,
“Charity, meaning benevolent love…is not shown by doing what the person loved desires but what the one who loves deems as needed by the
one loved…God’s love for man is God’s
doing what He thinks best for man and not what he desires. It is God’s willful direction toward man. But
for man to show love to God, he must first appropriate God’s agape for only God
has such an unselfish love.” (emphasis mine)
In placing this meaning into 1 Corinthians 13, we see how
often we have taken this chapter out of context. We often use this chapter to say that other
believers shouldn’t call out sin in our life (which is entirely unbiblical -
see Gal. 6:1), because the truth doesn’t “feel” like love to us. We may use
this chapter against judgment, or a myriad of other things, so that we can tell
people how they should love us. If it
doesn’t fit with our description of
love, we toss it out. As we see, however,
this isn’t about how we want Scripture to fit our emotions or pain, but rather
God’s meaning in His Word. This powerful
chapter of Scripture is meant to reveal to us how to love as God loves, by
loving people not in the way they WANT to be loved, but in the way a person
NEEDS to be loved. They need God Himself.
Truly, when we (true believers) look into the face of those we “love,”
since we ourselves have known God’s love, let us therefore give it. Give the LORD! When in doubt of whether you are giving love
to a person in an unselfish manner, replace the word love with God. Can you honestly look this person in the eye
and say, “I God you?”
Every day, God is expressing His love not in spite of pain and suffering, but in the midst of it…right smack dab in the middle
of all that is unlovely is God Himself and His great love. Let me leave you this Scripture challenge:
Luke 6:32, “And if you love those who
love you, what credit is that to you?
For even sinners love those who love them.” Jesus is telling us to love the unlovely… i.e.
when a spouse hurts us, when a child’s behavior doesn’t align with our
unrealistic standards, when a friend disappoints us, or yes, when an enemy
hates us (v.35). Having others return
our love, especially a godly love, is a beautiful thing, but how much more do
we give God to another human soul then when it is unmerited? How can we draw others toward the Author of
love, if our love does not reflect anything different from the world’s
description? I would be so bold as to suggest that we have not even experienced
giving away His love, until we have loved when it hurts the most…loving those
who don’t deserve it. For did not Christ
Jesus give love when it mattered most…while we were yet sinners (Rom.
5:8). This day, ask the Lord to open
your eyes to understand (to know, embrace) the love described in His Word, and
then give it away to the measure of understanding He has allotted to you in
this season. Let us set some souls free…with His True Love!
3. Lexical Aids to the New Testament: Key Word Study
Bible Strong’s numbers referenced: #25, #26 New
American Standard AMG Publishers
4.All
Scriptures are taken from the New American Standard Bible © Copyright 1960,
1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation.
Used by permission.
